shooting myself in the foot
I haven't written anything for a while. I feel bad about this. In part it's been due to being unusually busy offline (including trying to improve my general fitness), but I've also been keeping horrible hours and being too tired at the end of the day to stay awake long enough to write anything useful (I find myself thinking I'm editing, then jerk awake and see I've typed a bunch of jibberish during a microsleep).
There is another problem, though. I've got three potentially good ideas currently, but they should be done in sequence, and I feel I can't do the first one because I'm afraid of someone in particular finding it, and realising that it's based on something he experienced. I wouldn't have to worry about this except that I copied a few of my writings from here, to a file which I sent him, because he also writes and he has been sharing his writing with me, and expressed an interest in seeing what I'd been producing lately. There was no way I was going to let him see the site, for two or three reasons, but mainly because I knew if I did that, I would feel the need to censor myself, and I have really been enjoying being able to write freely. Anyway... this guy is a very good friend these days (although we used to fight a lot, because I have certain emotional boundaries and he didn't, at the time, grasp the necessity of respecting them) but I have capital-I-issues with certain things, and one of those is people searching for my online content after I've asked them not to. Which he did once, and I'm sorry to say I still don't feel like I can trust him 100%.
Yeah, so... I copied out a few pieces and sent them to him and said it was on the proviso that he agreed not to search for the site where I was posting my creations.
So if that person is reading, you know who you are, and you shouldn't be here, so just leave, please? And don't tell me you were here, and don't come back. Thank you.
For anyone else who has read this far - thank you for your patience :) I don't much want to lock this, and I don't want to have some things in the private folder because it splits the flow, and the whole point was to just write and not worry about the audience (I haven't told anyone who would normally read me that I'm even doing this - based on past experience that's a near guarantee of killing the project stone dead). Argh. It would be so nice not to be paranoid.
So, I am going to try a new approach, just for a little while, because if I go on not writing for too much longer I will stall indefinitely. I was going through some video footage taken with my old phone (2+ years ago) and thought hey, some of these, if I could extract stills, might help me write again! Poked around on teh interwebs and found a free app that could do that, ripped way too many stills (til I figured out how to get the right results), and I'm uploading some now. Hopefully the output will be agreeable, although if I find it too difficult, or if I get too cranky with not being able to develop existing characters (mainly Shelley, June and Alice - I do have rough plans on paper) I will have to put the pics aside for later.
Just wondering... if I did lock this, would you still want to read? Brief show of hands, please :)